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Self help questions and answers from you on Facebook

Joseph Clough

"Why do some spiritually "wise" people attack when their words are challenged? Slightly loaded question, but its happened to me twice, on fb, with two well known self help authors (for clarity I don't mean you LOL). Seems incredibly defensive, like its a "f off of my teritory" or something. Also, that question also extends to fan bases. It's something I havnt noticed happening here, but on one other websites for "enlightenment" including non religious ones, fans (or deciples) systematically online hang people with different belief systems or people who ask the wrong question. These kinds of forums can be destructive and I wondered how it can happen on some and not on others like yours."
My answer: It said that we can operate on a Meme level, that we go through certain levels of thinking, the first is our survival and each one progresses to a new way of thinking as we progress in our mind, the fourth one (blue) is where these people maybe coming from. That there is only one right way, all about the person, their view and beliefs build up there identity and when it is challenged in ways that you my of, being a thinker, a learner and being open minded it will be deemed as an attack on the very foundations of their world view and their followers, like Signs said. Ultimately this hardens their beliefs which makes them inflexible to learn new ways or even to consider. My own mindset it that I am open to learn, to change and evolve by seeking more information, my ideas and views change often, yes I have beliefs about the world and myself, but I know these are subjective depending on my learning's and application of them on a daily basis to see what works and resonates and my need to discover more and learn more. Many people can say they are spiritual/enlightened, even look at people who have done mass suicides to get to 'heaven' but we all know that that is not an enlightened way. Its important to realise its just there own 'stuff' and many will take Scriptures or ideas and bend them to fit their reality, which without attacking religion, i believe that happens a lot, the religion maybe fine, its the controllers and teachers that can bend words to their liking (not all of them!). As for why it does not happen on here, we are all awesome, open and not silly billy's! ;)
"I have a question. What do I do when a relationship isn't working out anymore and it becomes abusive and unhealthy. How do I convince myself to leave the comfort zone and move on with my life and leave all the mess behind?"
My answer: My thoughts, and most likely can be hard to act on, I have worked with many people who have been in this situation. Okay, if a relationship (i will broaden this to any relationship/friendship/career situation too as i feel it applies) is not working, we first must ask the question 'is it worth saving? deep down do I want this?) if the answer is yes, then we have to highlight whats going wrong and find the common ground/solution, as the other party has to ask this question too if there is any way of keeping the relationship. If the answer is no, then its less about convincing and more doing, here is the blunt part, you will not be doing anyone any justice or real happiness by staying in relationship that is unhealthy, you are actually in the long term prolonging their own suffering which I believe we have no right to do. On my RYD seminar someone was in the same situation, disliked this answer at first but knew in their situation it was right, the lady ended a long marriage with children and it was in her own words the best thing she ever did, she thought she was going to hurt this person but weeks later the person realised this too and moved on. My own view is that we have no right to stay in a relationship to not hurt their feelings, as we ultimately are, if they struggle in dealing with it, it should cause them to look deep within and to reflect on themselves and the relationship. So we can move on from the relationship and leave the mess behind or we can remain in the relationship and therefore live in the mess I know what one I would do. Hope this helps. Joseph
What is God? what is the meaning of life? are the holy books of all religions, metaphors? id death part of an ongoing cycle or is it the end? if all of the nerve endings are in my feet, why am i walking on my feelings?shouldnt we crawl or walk on my hands? why arent we born as ignorant adults and then develop into innocent babies...? why is the earth round and the sun round and the moon round?

My Answer: Ready...set...go "What is God?" It depends on the meaning you put on it, it can for some higher self and universe. But lets say it is all of those, I believe that there we are all one and therefore we are the one too, the part within the whole and the whole within the part. "What is the meaning of life?" To live a life of meaning. "Are the holy books of all religions, metaphors?" Metaphors and learning's that we can adapt into our life. "Is death part of an ongoing cycle or is it the end?" I personally believe it is not the end, i heard that energy can be neither created nor destroyed, and we are energy, so we are in a continuous cycle of transformation and change. "If all of the nerve endings are in my feet, why am i walking on my feelings?" If that is true, then it means we are on top of them, I'd prefer to be on top of them to guide them, so I am in control. "shouldn't we crawl or walk on my hands?" Tried crawling for a while when i was younger, didn't really stick and grew out of it, as the walking on my hands, mine are too small and weak to whole the rest of my body. "Why aren't we born as ignorant adults and then develop into innocent babies...?" because we come from innocence and oneness, and its our job to re-remember that and not be ignorant, as that's a choice. "Why is the earth round and the sun round and the moon round?" Because we'd fall off the earth if it were flat, the moon and sun looks nice round - oh and gravity pulls everything in to the core so it would have to be roundish. Joseph

"I want to know if hypnosis can kind of take the place of cognitive conditioning via regiment. The limbsystem.  The limbic system of the brain carries physical marks and holds those emotional scars that limit us through our lives. Can hypnosis "smooth over" the old damage?"

My Anwser: I am unaware of the limbic system of the brain, but from what I have read on similar subjects and Dr's I know who are experts in the mind body connection that thoughts and emotions mould the structure of the brain and change our body at a cellular level (Dr David Hamilton's work has great reports on studies of this). When in Hypnosis we are connecting consciously and unconsciously, it can cause our focus and attention to become aligned with our thoughts/feelings in how we would like to be on a mind and body level that will absolutely impact how our brain works, so I believe so but I am not a neuroscientist. Great question.
Joseph
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